Forks in the Road

When you come to a fork in the road, take it.
– Yogi Berra

A friend called out this text, which I would otherwise never had the chutzpa to write. He was lamenting how little our scattered cohort of Houstonians, he and I and a handful of others, know about each others’ lives over the past fifty years. I’ll tell you my story, he emailed, if you tell me yours. He did not set out the theme I settled on, forks in the road, bifurcations, the sequence of conscious decisions and choices I made  as I advanced through the murk, the fog of life. The casuistical angle I imposed on this writing assignment, my autobiographical pact with any readers it might have, does fit the innocent state of our cohort’s hive mind as we left high school and went out separately into the wide world under the illusion we decide anything in life. 

*

In April, 1963, I made a decision that would shape the rest of my life. I had managed to persuade Dad to let me attend McGill University in Montreal. Paris, my dream at seventeen, was out of reach, but McGill had accepted me and I had scrounged enough money cutting lawns and painting houses to contribute to the cost, of which tuition, in that day and age, was only a small part. Among the many applications I had sent out, one went to Beloit College, in Wisconsin, a private liberal arts college about which I was far from enthusiastic, measured alongside the exotic appeal of living in any place spelled with a Q, as in Quebec, where they spoke French besides. One afternoon before anyone else was home I collected the mail and found addressed to myself a letter from Beloit offering full tuition and much of the room and board there. I knew Dad would insist I accept this deal and give up on going to McGill, not only because this would cost the family less, but also because Wisconsin, though far way, on the distant side of Illinois, was at least in the US. All I had to do was tear up that letter and the path to Montreal was open. Obviously, I didn’t …

Read on …

Trigonometry

When we lived in Edmonton the wooden front steps of our house collapsed, after thirty or so harsh winters. I decided to replace them myself. First step was my first mistake. I just tore them out before looking at them properly, let alone taking measurements. Quickly I realized I was in trouble. In the first place, I didn’t have a table saw, which was going to cost a fortune — but, I said, that is just the price to pay for the new me I was going to become.

The more I thought about it the worse things got. I was unaware that there are pre-fab patterns and forms for this kind of thing. So it seemed that the task of figuring out how to get from the concrete slab at the bottom of what had been the steps to the threshhold above, where a small landing deck would have to be built, was going to require some advanced trigonometry. There was also the problem that the steps had sat upon concrete pillars, fortunately still in place, but which meant that … 

Well, I’m sure that the practically inclined can see what it means better than I can explain. A lot of sines and cosines, I thought, except that I had forgotten exactly what sines and cosines were and so would have to study up a bit. That too seemed like a self-improvement project. 

Nasrin was watching all this with a wary eye, especially when I started talking about how many six-packs the job was worth. That afternoon I went out to check the cost of table saws and to buy a text of trigonometry tables, plus to get the necessary beer. Before I left she made me promise not to buy anything but the beer until the next day, time to reflect.

Once I was safely out of the house, she got on the phone and hired sight unseen a handyman carpenter from the local paper. He said he would have it done by the end of the afternoon. When I got back he was already at work in the front yard. It was done by the end of the day — to my relief!

If you ever hear Nasrin making remarks about trigonometry books, which she does from time to time with glee and giggles, now you’ll know the background story.

So much for the balance between solid things and the cerebral, which I have almost always had out of whack.